Moving With Kids: Age-by-Age Tips, Packing Activities and Routines That Help

Moving with kids means packing up two things at once: the house and a child’s sense of what a normal day looks like. Adults choose the new address, the date and often the school. Children mostly get told. That lack of control runs through nearly every guide on the subject, and it points to a simple plan. Tell them early. Give them real jobs. Protect the small daily habits that make a day feel ordinary.

These tips for moving with kids follow the order of a move, with kitchen-table activities along the way.

When and how to tell your kids

The basics are the same almost everywhere: explain why you’re moving, roughly when, and what stays the same, then leave room for questions that come up later. Timing is where advice differs. Several guides say to share the news as soon as plans are firm. One mover’s guide suggests sitting the family down about three weeks before moving day. Earlier notice gives older kids time to tell friends, one checklist points out; toddlers are usually too young to fully grasp a move either way.

If two parents share the job, settle your own doubts first; one parenting guide notes that kids can feel extra stress when they sense one parent isn’t on board. Then be ready for a reaction you didn’t script: anger, tears, or a shrug now and clinginess later. Try not to get defensive or argue a child out of being sad. Say any feeling is okay, and name the good things ahead alongside the hard parts.

Babies, toddlers and preschoolers

When moving with a baby, protect naps and feedings as much as you can. Moving with toddlers calls for a short, concrete explanation: we’re all moving to a new house, together, and your bed and toys are coming too. Some little ones worry they’ll be left behind, so repeat the “together” part. Acting the move out with stuffed animals and a shoebox truck can help. So can a picture book about moving.

Elementary-age kids

Children from about five to ten can follow the reasons, but they may still need help feeling they have some say. Look at pictures of the new house, the school and the closest playground together. Then make a two-column poster: things that will stay the same (family, pets, favorite toys, the bedtime story) and things that will change (the bedroom, the school, the walk to the park). Let them illustrate it. One guide calls talking about what will change an important part of helping a child through the grief of moving, and adds that changes for the better belong on the list too.

Tweens and teens

Moving with a teen calls for being direct and asking for their opinion, then offering choices that count where you can: how the new room is set up, which activity they join, when a visit back might happen. For many teens, friends are the biggest loss. Help them plan how to break the news, starting with their closest friends one on one, before word gets around. And instead of “you’ll make new friends,” which brushes the sadness aside, acknowledge that leaving is hard.

Is there a hardest age? Guides disagree. One parenting guide cites research finding that older children struggle more with moves. One mover’s guide names roughly six to twelve and the early teens as the toughest years and says toddlers and preschoolers adapt fastest. A third says experts haven’t agreed on one, though younger kids generally adapt more easily; what matters most, it adds, is knowing your own child.

Turn packing into a family project

A box of their own

Give each child a box or two for their own things and let them decorate the outside with markers, stickers or drawings. Assign each child a color, a strip of tape or a sticker dot on every box they own, so they can spot their things in a stack. A big empty carton becomes a fort or a play truck while the grown-ups tape up the rest.

Keep, donate or let go

Sorting toys and outgrown clothes into a donation pile is a natural moving job, and where possible, let kids decide what goes. Go easy, though. One nonprofit parenting guide warns that forcing children to part with too much can sour them on the move. For younger children, one moving checklist suggests the opposite: pack favorite toys closer to moving day, while they sleep. Whatever the method, the lovey never goes in a box. It travels in a backpack or a hand.

The first-night box

Pack a first-night box or bag for each child: pajamas, a change of clothes, a toothbrush, a favorite book, a couple of toys, snacks and the blanket they sleep with. Kids’ rooms are generally packed last and unpacked first. One guide says to pack toys and decorations early but leave the bed, a lamp and one comfort item until moving morning, so the room still works for the last night.

Crafts for saying goodbye

• A moving memory book with photos of the old room, the street, the school and friends, plus a blank page saved for the new place.
• A friends notebook where classmates write their names and how to reach them, a physical reminder that the friendships go on.
• Homemade stationery for pen pal letters to old friends.
• A “places to see” list for the new town, researched together: parks, the library, a pool, an ice cream shop.
• Friendship bracelets to trade at a small goodbye get-together.

Keep the routines that matter

A psychologist quoted by one children’s mental health resource points out that younger kids in general thrive on routine and predictability, and a move uproots some of that. Keep mealtimes, naps and bedtime close to normal before the move, on the day itself and once you arrive, even if dinner is takeout eaten on the floor between boxes. And build extra time into every plan.

Moving day with kids

Who watches the kids

Moving day means open doors and heavy furniture. The usual advice is to line up a grandparent, a friend or a sitter to take younger children elsewhere during loading, or at least to set up one closed room with toys, snacks and a movie. If toddlers stay home, someone should watch the front door the whole time. Opinions split on school-age kids. One guide suggests that even older children spend a few hours at a friend’s house; another gives elementary-age kids a job, like labeling boxes or guiding a final walk through the empty rooms. A third simply says it depends on the child’s age and temperament.

Whoever stays, go over the plan in the morning, and introduce the kids to the movers. Strangers carrying a bed out the door may seem less alarming once a child has said hello to them.

A moving-day kit

Pack a bag or clear bin for each child that rides in the car, not on the truck:

• the comfort item they sleep with
• snacks they actually eat and a water bottle
• a spare outfit
• a coloring book, crayons, stickers and a small toy
• headphones and a charged tablet or an audiobook
• a toothbrush and any medicine they take

For a craft-minded kid, add a moving-day bingo card with squares for the truck, a dolly, a rolled-up rug and the very last box. Before you leave, walk the empty rooms together and let each child photograph their bedroom. Saying goodbye to the house can give children a sense of closure, and maybe parents too.

The first weeks in the new home

Set up kids’ rooms first

Unpack the children’s rooms before the kitchen. Put the bed together, make it with the familiar sheets and blanket, and get some photos and favorite books out. A room that looks like theirs can tell a child without words that the family lives here now. Let them weigh in on furniture and walls. Some kids want an exact copy of the old room, which is fine at first, though one guide suggests balancing it with accepting the change.

Explore the neighborhood

• Get library cards early. A card with their own name on it is a small thrill, and libraries often run story times and summer reading programs.
• Set up a scavenger hunt for younger kids: a red door, a basketball hoop, a dog, a mailbox.
• Walk the route to school and turn it into a made-up song for little ones or a hand-drawn map for older kids.
• Say hello to the neighbors. Some may have children close in age.

Starting a new school

Ask the old school to send records early, then confirm the new one has them. Contact the new school before the first day; even a short visit can take some of the fear out of an unfamiliar building. Let teachers know your child has just moved. Then find one activity, a team or a club, where kids meet others with the same interests. The psychologist quoted earlier on routine encourages putting down roots even when another move is likely in a few years.

Signs a child is struggling

Some sadness and grief for the old house and friends is normal. Guides say some kids settle within weeks while others need several months or more. Watch for:

• regression in younger children, such as clinginess, potty-training setbacks or not wanting to sleep in their own bed
• trouble sleeping or changes in appetite
• irritability or mood swings
• pulling away from friends and family
• falling grades

For most children, these signs may be temporary while they adjust. Check in anyway (a car ride is often an easy time to talk) and ask the question the same mental health resource suggests repeating throughout a move: what can I do to help? These or other big changes in behavior can also be warning signs of depression. If you’re concerned, check with your child’s pediatrician, and if signs of distress persist, one guide suggests a counselor experienced with children going through a move. And look after yourself: supporting a child’s sadness while staying upbeat can be draining.

Choosing a moving date around the school year

Moving early in summer gives children time to settle before classes start, while a move right before the first day leaves little room to adjust. Summer has a catch, though: it removes the ready-made social circle of school, so sign kids up for a camp, a sports league or a library program before fall. A midyear switch may be tougher, but depending on the child, it can go smoothly too. Summer is a busy season for movers, which is why one checklist advises booking well ahead.

Some families face two moves in a row. Green Moving, an Irvine-based moving company serving Los Angeles and Orange County, plans moves in Pacific Palisades around the rebuild after the January 2025 fire: out to a temporary rental, sometimes between rentals, and later back into a finished house. Its page for movers in Pacific Palisades says unpacking at the rebuilt home begins with the rooms you need first. For a family on its second move in a year or two, the kids’ rooms are a sensible place to start, for the reasons covered above.

Whatever the date, the core of moving with children stays the same: tell them early, give them jobs, keep bedtime.